Sunday, June 3, 2012

Love Language

I'm kicking off this Thirty Things challenge with, what I think, is one of the easier questions...

#28. What is your love language?

Senior year of high school I was assigned a book in my AP Psychology class called The 5 Love Languages. I thought it was an odd book to assign to high school students, but I read it and did all of the assignments that came along with it anyways. I remember coming to the realization that everyone feels loved in different ways. And everyone shows love in different ways. Typically, you show love in the way you want to recieve love.

When I read the book, I was only a couple months into my first relationship and wasn't really sure how to interpret my love language. But now that I've been in a relationship for a few years and have married my best friend, I feel like I know myself better than I did before. So, I googled the list of the original 5 love languages, and came across this online assessment that helped figure out what my love language is.

My Scores:

6   - Words of Affirmation
4   - Quality Time
2   - Receiving Gifts
8   - Acts of Service
10 - Physical Touch

I would definitely have to agree with the results. Although I feel like I could fit into each of these categories at different times, physical touch fits my love language to a tee. Here's what the website says about physical touch:

"This language isn’t all about the bedroom. A person whose primary language is Physical Touch is, not surprisingly, very touchy. Hugs, pats on the back, holding hands, and thoughtful touches on the arm, shoulder, or face–they can all be ways to show excitement, concern, care, and love. Physical presence and accessibility are crucial, while neglect or abuse can be unforgivable and destructive."

After figuring out my love language, I decided to make the hubby take the assessment as well to see if we shared the same language or not. These were his results:

2   - Words of Affirmation
11 - Quality Time
1   - Receiving Gifts
7   - Acts of Service
9  - Physical Touch

"In the vernacular of Quality Time, nothing says, 'I love you,' like full, undivided attention. Being there for this type of person is critical, but really being there - with the TV off, fork and knife down, and all chores and tasks on standby - makes your significant other feel truly special and loved. Distractions, postponed dates, or the failure to listen can be especially hurtful."
So, we have two different primary love languages. One thing is for certain - neither one of us scored very high in the gifts category. And we both scored pretty high in the acts of service. 

I think knowing what makes your spouse feel loved is truly important in a marriage. I'm grateful that this little "Thirty Things" challenge made me stop and think about it more. I need to remember to put down the cell phone or laptop more often and focus more on my husband every now and again.

So what love language are you?



  1. Hi, new reader here! I was looking for others taking part in '30 Things' and I found you through the "Hope and Dreams" blog :) I read 'The Five Love Languages' probably ten years ago but didn't remember what I was. So, thank you for the link!

    1. Hi Kassie! Glad you found us! Looking forward to following your journey through the 30 Things challenge :)



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