Monday, June 3, 2013

Things My Students Say

So you can imagine, as a teacher, I hear all sorts of random and crazy things coming out of the mouths of teenage students on a pretty regular basis. Usually, I just laugh and move on. But sometimes, the things they say are so funny that I have to stop and write it down so I can share it later with my husband. Well, I was cleaning out my purse today and came across a few sticky notes, and I thought I'd share.

While grading review packets, I come across the same wrong answer on 3 papers.... Berlin = a west African kingdom. And this is why we don't trust Wikipedia, or copy homework from a buddy. They must have forgot that they were in an American History class and not a World History class. Common mistake.

My students really tried to tell me that Babe Ruth is black. Not just was black, but is black. They thought he was still alive. After picking my jaw up from the floor and emailing our head baseball coach so that he could get a good laugh out of it too, I finally told the kids that they were wrong. They didn't believe me! They were so adamant that Babe Ruth was black, that I had to google it to convince them otherwise. Turns out they were mistaking Babe Ruth for Jackie Robinson. Hey, we've all been there right? Yeah, no....

Me: Who was the Chief Justice on the Dred Scott decision?
Student: Eli Whitney! No.... Harriet Tubman!
Me: Seriously??
Student: I didn't mean to say brain hurts...

After asking the students to reflect on their writing: "I lack the facts to analyze, thus leading myself on a hopeless endeavor to fluff my way out of it." Hey, at least he's honest...

Student A: "School makes me want to be a prostitute... wait, a stripper is more classy.
Student B: "What about an escort?"

Student in regards to Columbus Day: "A teacher told me it'd be the equivalent for having a Hitler day."

What a student told me when confronted about having another student's notes in his packet:
Student: I copied the notes.
Me: No, this is on notebook paper, you couldn't have copied these notes.
Student: Yeah, notebook paper is what spits out of a copy machine.
Me: Front and back with faded blue and red lines?
Student: Yeah.
Seriously? As if I don't use a copy machine on a regular basis...

While brainstorming a free-response essay on the Washington, Adams, and Jefferson: "Washington fought in the Civil War." Maybe they meant the Revolutionary War? Yeah, that's got to be it.

And, because every post needs a picture, one of my students thought they'd be a smarty pants and answer the Lesson Essential Question for the standard class:

Maybe next year I'll remember to post things my students say more often and as they happen. We could all use a good laugh, right?

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