Thursday, January 17, 2013

Not Normal

During lunch I checked my phone to see if there were any messages that had come in during the morning. The hubby had sent me a text saying that he thinks friends of ours had put an offer in on a house. Had no idea they were even looking. I mean, we both knew they were upset with their current living arrangement, but we didn't know they were going to take that big of a leap to fix it. I logged on Facebook, and sure enough, there was a status update about an offer being accepted along with a link to the property. Not bad. Builder basic. But definitely nice. Especially for first time home buyers like our friends are.

But then it hit me. I'm not sure how to describe the feeling exactly... guilt? like I'm on the wrong track? I feel like society dictates the order in which we're suppose to live our lives. First you meet a guy. Then the ring. Then the vows. Then the house. Then the kids. I mean, that's the ideal, right? Yet there are so many people that do things out of order nowadays. How many couples move in together before they get married? How many children are born out of wedlock every single day?

The hubby and I have a plan. We talk about it quite frequently. Sure, we make changes to it occasionally, but the basic plan has always remained. No house until all of the debts in our names are paid off. No house until we have a decent emergency savings fund built up. No house until we can put some sort of down payment on it. And that's going to take a while. We may or may not have our first kid before we even buy our first house.

Usually, that's okay with me. That's okay with us.

But yet... days like today, I still have this feeling like we're doing something wrong. Like we're going against what society says. Like we're going out of order.

And then I have to remind myself... we're not normal. We're not like everyone else. We're not going by what society tells us to do.

As soon as I remind myself of that fact, I remind myself of our plan. The plan we talk about most nights before going to bed. The plan we talk about over the weekends while sitting on the couch. The plan we talk about on long road trips. The plan and dreams we have for our future. And I'm reminded that our plan makes me feel safe. The idea of feeling safe and secure in our future makes a whole lot more sense than trying to fit into the mold that society deems to be "normal."

If "normal" means going into debt to the point where money stresses me out, then I don't want to be normal. I'm looking forward to the day where I control money and money is not controlling me. And if it takes being "weird" to get there, then sign me up!

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